que sara sara

it's official

2005-11-25T23:06:00.000+08:00

i am mad and beyond hope. am doing this again. at the expense of studying.

http://subdued-ecstacy.blogspot.com/

fire

2005-11-25T17:19:00.000+08:00

[des'ree feat. babyface]

You're riding in my car
I turn on the radio
I'm pulling you closer
But you keep tellin' me no
You say you don't like it
But I know that you're a liar
'Cause when we kiss
Ooh...

Fire

Late at night
You're taking me home
You say you wanna stay
But I want you to go
I say I don't love you
But you know I'm a liar
'Cause when we kiss
Ooh...

Fire

You had a hold on me right from the start
A grip so tight I couldn't tear it apart
My nerves all jumpin' actin' like a fool
Your kisses might burn
But my heart stays cool

Well Romeo and Juliet
Sampson and Delilah
Baby you can bet
They were burnin' with desire
If I say split
Then you know that I'd be lying
'Cause when we kiss
Ooh...

Fire

When we kiss
I'm on fire
Your tenderness
Gives me desire
I can't resist
Your tender lips
When we kiss
Ooh...

Fire

grammatical errors

2005-11-25T03:08:00.000+08:00

correcting that in someone else's report ( not really my bloody job but still my bloody business) starting from 1am in the morning is not fun at all. wins! now i know how you feel when those errors are so glaringly apparent and all you feel like doing is re-writing the whole piece of crap again. argh!

btw, to all the exceptionally imaginative lurkers out there, please try not to read so much into this blog. i do write what i mean to say but it does not mean that all i write are related. and if you are one of those compulsive lurkers, then i suggest you spend time doing more constructive things than reading the rants of a 19-year-old. :P

just because i said that i will throw my results of this sem at you does not equate to me having to score good grades (which seems to be an impossiblity at this point of time). it simply means i will throw the results at you. ha! ok... trying to be clever aside, i have to TRY to do something to turn around the possible detrimental consequences.

a different kind of maturity

2005-11-22T23:59:00.000+08:00

typically, it's the little things that the people around me do/say that touch me the most.
9 hours of biz law (not continuous of course. do you think i'm mad?) and i'm still surviving. somewhat anw. it's times like this that i amaze myself. haha..

even myself cant quite explain the nature of it, but i'm just happy and blessed that it's there.

bond

2005-11-21T23:43:00.000+08:00

mostly brought about by circumstances. sometimes by chance. rarely, no reason at all.

despite complaining to everyone who is interested (or not) in hearing, am in fact blessed in more ways than i deserve.

of soft spots

2005-11-18T21:16:00.000+08:00

"...and strangely, the enlivening and riveting aspect of the human experience can be attributed to the way people deal with their soft spots. very often when bounded by relationships of the past, it is often never the actuality of the person or the thing itself that affect us; but rather , the inherent ablity these memories have in stirring up inner turmoil, and emotions that would otherwise, lie dormant...

... soft spots are there to humble us and remind mankind of its vulnerabilities; they are the battle scars of emotional wars waged and triumphed over, they are our fondest times, our happiest moments, our deepest pains, that remain to be embraced..."

am too uninspired to be original. and i dont think anyone wants to hear more whinings about my mundane life.

bad influence. in a nice way.

2005-11-12T23:53:00.000+08:00

we are going to become broke and grow fat at the rate we are proceeding. funny how our (ex)colleagus think we dont eat enough. i now realise the importance of having friends not in the taking-exams cycle. to rescue my sanity. to remind me that i'm not the most pathetic one with 12 consecutive days in school. to make me rediscover the magical holiday season ahead.

even though i am utterly drained of my monetary resources after every date with you, thanks for the binging feasts, madness/lameness/sarcasticness and all that are in between. i'll miss you when you leave.

2005-11-09T23:15:00.000+08:00

when i'm sleep deprived, i tend to
(a). get emotional and want to cry.
(b). be really pissed with certain people and want to kill them.

(a) is healthier but takes up too much time and energy. (b) is more enticing because i already have a few candidates on hand. heck! i only need to kill one to gain complete satisfaction.

gah!

2005-11-08T21:03:00.000+08:00

for a place that prides itself to be different, i can see why with the number of strange characters i encounter.

like a foreigner who got traumatised so much that she is supposed to have suffered an almost breakdown because she lost her laptop.
like a double degree scholar who doesnt have the mental capacity to take constructive criticisms.
like a fake bimbo who thinks she can get away for everything by acting bimbotic.

who needs tv when real life is so much more exciting?

to all

2005-11-07T23:51:00.000+08:00

who have been part of my life in some point in time:

We all take different
paths in life,
but no matter where we go,
we take a little of each
other everywhere.

Tim McGraw

rambling on

2005-11-07T21:14:00.000+08:00

i dont know why i gave this obsession to write. maybe i just like to capture all the moments in life that touch my heart. maybe it's a form of escape for me. i agree it takes up a lot of time (sometimes too much). and on lazy occasions, i just feel like leaving something hanging instead of completing it. but the bottom line is that i like to put my thoughts on paper. i know we have to move forward in life. however, while rushing through our busy little schedules, i find it good to slow down and look back on past experiences and to relive the memories. perhaps i'm in one of my contemplative moods. or that i want to postpone starting on my reports proper. :P

the time i spend writing blog entries is directly proportionate to the time i should be spending to do my school work.

am not trying to be a brat

2005-11-06T21:43:00.000+08:00

but i think the sch admin hates me.

evident when i have courses four days a week with the following timetable:
mon 830-1145
tue 1530-1845
wed 830-1145
thur 1530-1845

dont bs me

2005-11-06T20:36:00.000+08:00

i cant stand bullshit when it comes to schwork. i hate people who talk big and do nothing. if you have nothing to contribute, for heaven's sake, keep your mouth shut. i hate people who act bimbotic in front of me. i'm straight as straight can be so i'm in no way affected by whatever bimbotic acts are supposed to achieve. i admit i'm a demanding person who doesnt suffer fools. dont try to bullshit me by telling me you cant do this and that cos the resources are unavailable. especially when i can locate them and shove them in your face within the span of five mins. i'm quite sick of having to force people to do work. for God's sake, evereyone is either in the cusp of or already in adulthood. so behave like adults! surprisingly, i managed to keep my temper in check even though i feel like slapping people awake. Gah!

i cant say that i'm extremely close to my parents but they're the ones who taught me my values so i love using them as sounding boards with regards to my relationships with others.

certain experiences have made me learnt to be much more comfortable being myself. i've always been an independent person but i do suffer bouts of self-doubt. i think the most important thing i took away from all these is that there will always be people who accept me completely and that i dont need to pretend to be a person i'm not. and that is very crucial for me and the way i intend to lead my life in future.

crushed under a pile of work

2005-11-03T21:32:00.000+08:00

you know you have totally NO LIFE when you are going to spend 7 days a week in school. when that week has only two official school days. damn!

thank YOU for making it a little bit better.

escaping but not for long

2005-10-30T23:58:00.000+08:00

i had an incredible time this weekend running away from the big RESPONSIBILITES word. which basically involve myself having fun and pretending that whatever linking to the R-word dont exist. unfortunately, at this very point of time, i'm still pathetically wishing that time will freeze forever and i get to escape. sadly, i've learnt long ago that miracles are far and few.

well, i can continue whining abt having a lot to do or start doing them even if i dont want to. somehow, the people around me are likely to prefer the latter much more. i will do just that. and if i cant, i will just have to keep my mouth shut most of the time so as not to irritate the hell out of others. wish me luck.

the weather

2005-10-27T20:51:00.000+08:00

in my world, there's no such thing as raining or pouring. just crazy 'little' thunderstorms.

what's the point of having public holidays when i have to reschedule partically ALL my seminars? and do projects on the rest of the days?

not stressed and freaking out

2005-10-24T23:10:00.000+08:00

1 week till all my presentations come crashing down on me
5 weeks to exams
9 weeks passed without me knowing what i've learnt

maybe it's the fact that the final exam papers constitute only a max of 40% of each of my course assessment. but the stress has yet to sunk in. and i'm freaking out cos of that.

written words

2005-10-23T23:14:00.000+08:00

i find it therapeutic to write. no one needs to understand it excpet me. the way trains of thoughts are translated into words. the wonder of rediscovering a beautiful quote or a forgotten phrase. even running my hand across the pages and feeling the indentations made by the pen. i'm not much of a writer but i still like writing about the small little things that touched me, upset me, amazed me, angered me and made me.

good training

2005-10-23T22:31:00.000+08:00

i sat in a room for 7hours in an attempt to complete a proj presentation. except for toilet breaks (which i didnt take that many) and lunch break (which is not considered a break cos we bought food back and ate while we continued doing). odac's sit-in-a-room-and-continue-discussing-for-long-time i.e. debriefs definitely helped trained me.

my brain is currently NOT saturated. ya right.

of friendship

2005-10-22T21:00:00.000+08:00

funny how much i enjoy doing nothing at all with my closest friends.

i love the fact that we can not speak at all and still feel so comfortable with the silence. i love fact that we notice the same weird things and laugh about them without having to tell each other about what we saw because we just know. i love the fact that we have nothing to prove to one another - that we dont have to feign anything. i love the fact that he fills my mind with thoughts of him that i sometime hate myself for it. i love that special friendship.

even in this point of my life, i still feel that i have yet to leave sec sch. thanks to gossip sessions, senseless gigglings and (more often than not) just plain acting stupid. girl power! :D

to believe

2005-10-19T23:46:00.000+08:00

-unknown-

to believe is to know that every day
is a new beginning.
it is to trust that miracles happen,
and dreams really do come true.
to believe is to see angels dancing among the clouds,
to know the wonder of a stardust sky
and the wisdom of the man in the moon.
to believe is to know the value of a nurturing heart,
the innocence of a child's eyes
and the beauty of an aging hand,
for it is through their teachings we learn to love.
to believe is to find the strength
and the courage that lies within us,
when it is time to pick up the pieces and begin again.
to believe is to know we are not alone,
that life is a gift and this is our time to cherish it.
to believe is to know that wonderful surprises
are just waiting to happen,
and all our hopes and dreams are within reach.
if only we believe.

creative thinking

2005-10-17T18:16:00.000+08:00

if i was never in this situation, i would just be as superficial as everyone else in making baseless assumptions about others. even if it is a passing phase, i'm forever changed because of it.

we become so preoccupied with the future that we forget what matters is now.
life is too short for what ifs. being reckless and throwing caution into the wind - you'll never know unless you try.

to be different

2005-10-16T12:35:00.000+08:00

i look forward to the day when i no longer make apologies for my actions. when i no longer think twice just because i'm afraid of what other people perceive me to be. when i dont give a damn as long as i'm not doing any morally incorrect thing.

i've learnt to feel more and judge less. because i know i'll be judged for it by the people around me. i've also realised that you should never claim to understand (and i become more careful using that word) when you're not personally in the situation. i come to a greater understanding to who i care about and that sometimes, i may unintentionally end up hurting the people i care for. but that's not the end of the world.

imperfections are a part of life i've to accept and hopefully embrace. i intend to perserve the self i once was. i dont regret being affected by it. i just do not wish for it to revolve around my world. i should revolve around my world. this means i should stop allowing it to permeate my mind so much. being part of my life doesnt equate to being my life. and i aim to be more free-spirited than before. it doesnt entail shrinking responsibilites. it means doing what i want despite my responsibilities.

being content with the little things in life has been what i'd advocated and still is the case. sometimes, we all just need a little reminder to make us recall that.

convention

2005-10-15T15:29:00.000+08:00

something that i'm deviating further and further from. that scares me.

an award

2005-10-14T00:27:00.000+08:00

that i truly deserve:

best procrastinator

burdens of being nice

2005-10-12T16:00:00.000+08:00

i wonder why i even bother.

never getting out of it

2005-10-12T10:07:00.000+08:00

i'm screwed up! i have things to do and courses to study yet i'm not going about doing them. it's always so much easier pretending that they dont exist and leaving them aside than actually sitting down doing them. i'm losing the sense of satisfaction i usually get when i complete my work. and it's this sense of satisfaction that pushes me ahead to do whatever crappy work i have to but hate to.

at certain point of time, i'm starting to wonder if this is the kinda life i want to lead for the next 4 years. i see the value in sch and i've come too far to move backwards. but after that, what? it seems so purposeless to go to sch at times. sure, you make friends, do activities and eventually (i hope to) graduate. then what? get some 9-to-5 job and slog my way through for the next 40 years? and the point of it being?

alternatively. i can think abt doing the things i love. but now i'm starting to question myself what exactly do i love doing. unfortunately, mind is blank at this point of time. why must there be a purpoes in life? why cant we all be lauded for doing nothing? at times, i feel so ordinary that i freaking hate it. i'm doing what everyone expects me to do and since i've been doing this for ages, i cant shut out the voices in my head telling me what to do. instead of doing what i want, whatever i do is what they want me to do. and what i think i want to do is actaully influenced by what i'm expected to do.

this feels like running in a circle. going round and round. becoming more confused as the seconds tick by but never getting out of it.

once upon a time

2005-10-10T14:21:00.000+08:00

when holidays meant playing, slacking and relaxing.
when there were straight answers to questions.
when time management and prioritising were non-issues.
when gaining acceptance was never part of the equation.
when 'responsibilities' was simply a long but meaningless word.
when the world seemed so much more beautiful.

been thinking a lot about things in general recently. and what perfect timing for my mum to tell me that her side of the family has a history of depression cases. at least if i officially go crazy, there's an actual reason behind it.

after today, i'll have officially spent one third of my midterm break doing nothing constructive.

spent some time reading the blog entries i wrote in the past and was amused by quite a few of them. heck! i'm so self-entertaining. and i realised that i was so much more articulate in the past. what is happening to me?

ill at ease

2005-10-07T18:48:00.000+08:00

i hate the state that i'm in right now.

i feel that there's so many things being out of my control. sch wise, all my projs are not even close to being started proper. crap! and for certain course, my group is not progressing at all. and i'm worried. i never like to leave things till the very last min although i'd like to think that i'm capable of trying to do the work within that time frame. i'm tired of trying to push/initiate/force pp into doing work and am frustrated when they're not doing. granted, i may have slacked off at some point of time but it sucks that other groups have alr done so much and we have nothing to show for.

i'm seriously worried for MA and biz law. i could understand the concepts yet when it comes to assignments and tests, i feel completely lost. there yet not there. so what am i missing? this whole crap abt independent learning is my responsibility for myself. how am i expected to be responsible when i'm still groping in the dark at this very moment? on one hand, i feel that i should not panic cos afterall, whatever we learn will be assessed based on our own profs' standards. on the other hand, i hate the fact that everything is so bloody uncertain.

it breaks my heart that certain things are the way they are now. sometimes, i wish i had the courage of deviating from the norm and hate myself for not being able to do so.

honestly, i think i'll eventually end up killing myself some point of time. it seems so foolish of me to cling on to the hope that things have not changed when i know it's time for me to let go.

mishmash of thoughts of total randomness

2005-10-01T22:58:00.000+08:00

i take my hat off those people who are alr taking/are going to take accounting. i cant do that for nuts. after attempting to do my management accounting work, i've discovered that handling any numbers with more than 3 zeroes is not within my capability if i intend to remain sane. which means that i've gone insane many times over alr. darn! i've never spent such a long time trying to fig out how to do 10 MCQs. universities are trying to con their students into thinking that MCQs are easy when they obviously are not. especially when one wrong ans will cause a 1/4 mark deduction. which means it's a technical possibility to get a negative mark for the paper. which finally rub the fact that i'll be qt screwed in my face. my ability to fall asleep after staring at the textbook for 30s is NOT going to help.

my parents should hide more of my money for me.
mum: hey! do you know that you have $xxx in your (insert previously unknown but newly discovered) account?
me: really??? since when did i have that account?
so perhaps i'm not as poor as i thought. hahas...

i have this weird tendency of formulating strange thoughts. and these thoughts tend to translate into strange-and/or-totally-out-of-point ques i ask people. so the next time i ask you something strange, pls do not be alarm. there's really no particular reason behind it.

horrendous expenditure week

2005-09-28T23:18:00.000+08:00

for once, my horrible tendency to spend warrants an entry because at the end of this week, i need to beg for cash.

sat
on: some breaded stingray at some fusion cafe; malibu bay breeze; cab fare
at: marina square; indochine opp fullerton
with: funties

yesterday
on: dinner in three parts
(1) satay, kangkong, salad youtiao, lala, oyster omlette
(2) chapatti, fried dumplings
(3) dessert
at: lao pa sat
with: deb and yz

today
on: three amigos pasta; bratwurst jamboree pizza; irishcream mudpie; sweet temptations
at: nydc; haagen daz (HV)
with: mr chiang

tml
on: movie

fri
on: expensive lunch

oh crap!

after midnight sydrome

2005-09-26T00:25:00.000+08:00

the only reason behind having three posts in three hours is that i'm stuck doing my report of a report. the last time i've been so hardworking is almost a year ago. i think. unfortunately, it's a freaking 25% of the final grade so i have to do it even if it kills me.

i've discovered this interesting fact abt myself: i tend to come up with crazy/brave/stupid/alltheabovementioned ideas in the wee hours of the morning. which can be quite detrimental to health and reputation cos i usually carry them out eventually (since i intend to stick to a decision made?). sometimes i question my sanity. so far, nothing really bad has come out of them but whenver i think back on those times, "why the heck did i do that for?!?"

a talking mirror

2005-09-25T22:11:00.000+08:00

my mother never fails to remind me that i've stopped growing up and start growing out, specifically sideways.

parents, you gotta love them.

i dont understand

2005-09-25T21:32:00.000+08:00

how some people apparently derive joy out of manipulating others. is twirling people round her little finger a very fun thing to do? and the saddest part of it is that she makes herself look like the victim at the end of it all. sometimes, i really feel like saying "You deserve it!" in her face whenever her actions bring about nasty consequences. she has yet to learn her lessons and somehow i dont think she ever will in this lifetime.

i feel sorry for the people who have been/are manipulated by her. i guess we all see what we want to. because her actions are so glaringly obvious.

i'll never want to live her life. in my world, things are very clear cut. be nice to those you like and civil to those you dont. what the need for manipulation?

anw, to someone who i know lurks around and read this blog: you owe me big time and i hope you feel guilty for what you have done! :p

creep

2005-09-19T21:12:00.000+08:00

[radiohead]

When you were here before, couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel, your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts, I wanna have control
I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice, when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here, ohhh ohhh

She's running out again...
She's running out, she runs, runs, runs, runs... runs...

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here

parents

2005-09-19T21:11:00.000+08:00

when you start not giving a fucking damn, it speaks volume of the relationship.

categorisation

2005-09-14T15:03:00.000+08:00

i tend to compartmentalise. i categorise almost everything in my life. inanimate objects, even people. doing so tends to satisfy the innate need to belong.

thus, i'm uncomfortable with the fact that i have something uncategorisable in my hands. it's neither black nor white. heck, it's not even considered grey. it falls somewhere in the million shades of grey that exist. somehow, i dont think a lot of pp will be inclined to support my position and actions if they come to hear abt it. which makes everything more complex. i'm more concerned abt other's perceptions of myself than i care to admit.

then again, it's things like these that make life a little bit more quirky, a little less predictable and a whole lot more fun. so at the risk of alarming my whole world (dont worry, i tend to exaggerate), i'll be throwing away quite a number of previously held beliefs and go with my gut.

if

2005-09-14T14:55:00.000+08:00

[bread]

If a picture paints a thousand words,
Then why can't I paint you?
The words will never show the you I've come to know.
If a face could launch a thousand ships,
Then where am I to go?
There's no one home but you,
You're all that's left me too.
And when my love for life is running dry,
You come and pour yourself on me.

If a man could be two places at one time,
I'd be with you.
Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way.
If the world should stop revolving spinning slowly down to die,
I'd spend the end with you.
And when the world was through,
Then one by one the stars would all go out,
Then you and I would simply fly away

listening to this song never fails to make me feel sad

why i'm having problems

2005-09-10T14:05:00.000+08:00

this is what my fav textbook says:

For instance, 'Some cats are mammals' is true because there exists at least one cat that is a mammal. Similarly, the sentence 'Some monkeys are no fish' is true because there exists at least one monkey that is not a fish.

this is ridiculous! why do i only see logical leaps when this particular course is supposed to be on being logical?

most incredulous thing i've heard in the week

2005-09-10T00:56:00.000+08:00

"i'll get the money from my parents. sure, they do grumble but will still give it to me in the end. and i'm proud of that (aka being able to get the cash from parents)."

can you believe the statement was uttered by 21yr old university undergraduate? i dont know who i should feel more sorry for: him or his parents. thankfully, he's only an acquaintance. i had half the mind to knock some sense into him if he were a friend. literally.

i love thursdays

2005-09-08T22:08:00.000+08:00

cos i realise on such days that i am completely illogical and cannot think critically for nuts.

"No man can be a rhapsodist who does not understand the meaning of the poet. For the rhapsodist ought to interpret the mind of the poet to his hearers, but how can he interpret well unless he knows what he means?"

how can i isolate the premises and come up with the conclusion when the whole freaking sentence is speaking greek to me? and that constitutues like 10% of the fab assignment i have to do. someone pls just kill me.

realisation

2005-09-02T00:06:00.000+08:00

i blog more during sch term cos i'm doing it when i shld be STUDYING. and i will foolishly continue to do so.

so i'm paranoid

2005-09-01T23:46:00.000+08:00

maybe he's right . that focusing on the 'bad' things in life will only make them come true. then again, i cant help it. it's not as if i want to focus on them. just that they happoen to be true. like how it will always have to rain when i need to go to sch while the scorching sun makes its appearance when i'm dont. i dont mind the minor stuff coming true. they will merely constitute towards the inconveniences in life. however, i'm now feeling that everything in my life is going smoothly. too smoothly in fact. and that i shld be prepared for things to start crashing down on me soon.

so i'm paranoid.

two weeks in sch and i've finally realised that there's no dress code for us. from the papers no less. not that it'll make any diff. it just reinforces the fact that i always receive filtered down, way overdued info.

was qt funny when one of my classmate was asked by someone if the sch term has started. apparently cos the person feels that there wasnt many people walking around. everyone just happens to be underground. and to a large extent, my sch doesnt look like a sch. at least i'm beginning to adapt to the high-techness of it all.

un-planned

2005-08-27T22:30:00.000+08:00

i cant believe i'm spending my long weekend mostly at home ploughing through the notes and texts. where have my friends gone to?!?!?! not that doing such a hardworking thing -rolls eyes- is bad. considering i take an average of two hours to read up on one seminar worth of stuff per course. (i need to speed read soon. somehow.) just that it's such a waste consiering that i may never get to fully enjoy the long weekend again thanks to all the commencing projects. most of which i have no clue as to how to start.

anw, i conclude that i shld no longer plan. cos nothing works out. in fact, not planning seems to reap better usage of time. i know this logic is extremely warped but hey! there's always the Murphy's Law.

"i still dunno..." i was actually refering to lunch when she told me the exciting and interesting news that kept me excited and interested for the next few hours. i love it when people tell me news/gossips on their own accords. because you'll never expect them. we had a lot of fun speculating the reactions of the rest who are not yet informed.

just sitting down and talking to a good friend can be so fulfilling. sometimes i wish that time can extend for more afternoons like this.

abstract

2005-08-24T10:03:00.000+08:00

the title describes the very first course i took in uni. it's kinda like a cross between econs and gp. after three hours, i still:
(a). cant really pronounce my prof name.
(b). am trying to figure out what i'm supposed to know.

yay.

seminar style is quite interesting though. at least the amount of interaction in class keeps me from falling asleep. esp after nine months of not schooling. and my class has quite a number of international students which is cool.

honestly, i still feel pretty alone in sch. everyone seems to know everyone alr. the people are friendly and all but i get the feeling that i-do-not-belong. that's what happens when a significant number of your friends live in the west/decide to attend schools in the west/both.

and for all those out there who are complaining about having to purchase textbooks, hear this: i need textbooks for every other course and i have erm... let's see 35 courses to take.

anonymous

2005-08-21T17:06:00.000+08:00

as we are born to live, we live only to learn. as we are born to learn, we learn only to love. and as we learn to love, we begin to live.

school

2005-08-17T23:41:00.000+08:00

i wonder why they call it an academic briefing when i dont feel briefed in the first place. less than 50% of what i was told was new to me. anw, i wasnt in the same room as the speakers. attended the briefing through a webcast due to insufficient seats. everything is so technologically advanced that i feel i have to be schooled in how to use the facilities before i can start lessons proper.

current preassigned timetable puts me as having to go to school four times a week. i have no idea whether it is the confirmed version for the first sem. since i'm exempted from 4 courses (which up till now i have no idea if i still need to sit for exams for them), i'm considering the possibility of cramming other courses in place of them. for what purpose? hopefully, i can graduate faster. which doesnt even seem remotely possible but one can always hope.

i have no problem with having to plan. just that having to plan for everything within a spcific timeframe with a million and one restrictions is not really very fun to do. i may have to start on a flow chart soon.

and biao, i do intend to work parttime. but first i'll have to settle timetable, settle into sch, settle for cca and most imptly, convince parents (who are currently in this alternate realm that has them saying "we want you to be independent but no... we dont want you to work") before i can do anything abt parttime employment.

yup! i'm having the time of my life now.

ambushed

2005-08-14T21:35:00.000+08:00

to think that i believed in the goodness of people and that all i'll get is being supersoaker-ed. thankfully, the cynical side of me decided to play it safe and i refused to change out of my uniform.

i think they somehow knew that i will clean up my mess. so i was ambushed in the kitchen when i attempted to retrive the mop. nothing much happened. just that i was grabbed from behind, forcefully restrained and had whipping cream smeared all over my face and hosed down. no amount of screams and struggles on my part allowed me to escape from the 3 perpetrators. and the rest of my lovely colleagues suddenly decided to be innocent by-standers armed with digicams despite their claims that they love me.

i managed to take my revenge after giving chase around half of rx, getting locked outside the outlet and a few exhausting fights (the exhaustion is felt today which goes to show that i need to exercise). now if i could get my hands on those cameras, i will perhaps be able to perserve whatever that's left of my reputation.

the gifts i received are very cool and touching. in fact, reading what they wrote for me almost made me cry. for now, they'll remain on the floor until i find a place to hang the frame.

that concludes my 7-month working slint before sch starts. and i miss my colleagues already.

I Beg Your Pardon

2005-08-09T11:01:00.000+08:00

[Kan Kon]

There once was a time and there once was a way
We had something going and to my dismay
Attention to me seemed to drift though I don't know where

And when we're alone seems there's nothing to say
I bring up a topic and you push it away
You say that you do but I think it's just you don't care
Why do I feel you're using me

Are we an item or are we just two
I need some commitments all I ask of you
Your lifestyle can change
Don't be 'fraid what you think's in store

I know what's on your mind you've got lots to lose
Your shallow acquaintances what's there to choose
You won't get too deep even though I'm worth so much more

So think about it carefully

Smile for a while and let's be jolly
Love shouldn't be so melancholy
Come along and share the good times while we can

Do you want to hustle?
Do you want to salsa?

Do you want to hustle?
Do you want to salsa?

If that's how you want it; that's how it'll be
There's no use in trying or making you see
That love don't come easy you don't know what it's about

To get things together won't take any pain
Don't need to see/hear from you ever again
From this day on listen but no more
Please count me out, and you know what I'm talkin' about

Smile for a while and let's be jolly
Love shouldn't be so melancholy
Come along and share the good times while we can

I know now's the time that I went to find something new
You know it's your crime that I'm out to find someone too

just so you know

2005-08-09T10:31:00.000+08:00

i'm kinda tired of sending out sms-es to pp without receiving any reply. so pp pls take the hint. hahas... with regards to the above mentioned problem, a particular mr chiang suggested that perhaps a blank msg shld be sent as a form of acknowledgement that the msg is received if the recipient is too lazy to think of a reply. strange way of doing things but guess that'll also do.

came to the conclusion that i'll never ever be prepared for sch. my room looks exactly the same way since the last day of the As. i think it became worse cos without having to use the table, it doubled as a dumping ground for my stuff. c.o.n.g.r.a.t.u.l.a.t.i.o.n.s to me.

i'm ~~kinda~~ ~~quite~~ very broke. see the denial there. not in the literal i-have-no-money-left-to-spend way. but in the i'm-spending-too-much-of-my-hard-earned-money-for-my-own-good way. and i keep coming up with justifications to spend more.

misunderstood

2005-07-31T18:02:00.000+08:00

i'm sick and tired of having to explain myself to others.

who let the dogs out?

2005-07-22T23:39:00.000+08:00

as with all hosting, i had to face irritating and unreasonable customers. just that today's bitch count happen to multiply a normal day's. they simply refused to listen. they refused to be seated at 2-seaters claiming that it was too cramped. they refused to shared. one particular canine actually told me to move another customer cos "i dont want to fce her butt throughout my meal". excuse me?!?! when i tried to be polite and told pp they had to wait cos we were fully occupied, they went like "ya! i could see that." if i ignored them, they would complain that no one attended to them while they were in the queue.

this is what i love about shenton way. two hours of human encounter and my entire day is destroyed. stupid self-absorbed assholes.

lack of face-to-face contact

2005-07-17T00:05:00.000+08:00

guess what? i'm currently 'talking' to my bro on msn when he's just sitting across the room from me. firstly, he refuses to ans my ques when i ask him face to face. so i am flooding him with msg. secondly, it's kinda amusing to play around with the wireless thing my dad just bought which allows both computers to access the net at the same time. the only prob being i'm using the newer comp which has essentially nothing much. having to resort to this is amusing and lame for the first few mins. then it becomes apparent that it's kinda sad cos i'm unable to talk to my bro face to face. however, if this enables me to communicate with him more, so be it.

btw, my amazing new sch has just exempted me from my foundation modules of calculus and econs. great if not for the fact that i've returned all i've learnt to my jc teachers. erm... so am i expected to read up? i think i shld be happy that they exempted me but now i'm qt screwed larh. i think the sch is very interesting. for one, they seem qt supportive of its students working part-time cos my email acc for sch is flooded with job offers forwarded by some sch admin pp. i'm qt apprehensive abt attending sch though. cos i dont really know anyone who is going for the same course as me.

i'm spending a lot this month. on the pretext of having to get stuff for uni. hahas... who am i kidding?

movie marathons are quite fun. although weird parts of your body tend to cramp from staying still in one position too much. and that they really cost a lot of money. hmm... i need to engage in a negotiation regarding money with my parents yet again.

但求心静

2005-07-12T02:25:00.000+08:00

一个人的快乐，
不是因为他拥有的多，
而是因为他计较的少。
多是负担，
是另一种失去，
少非不足，
是一种有余；
舍弃也不一定是失去，
而是另一种更宽阔的拥有。

the little things

2005-07-06T00:25:00.000+08:00

it doesnt take a lot to be happy. just an enjoyable dinner with friends or re-discovering why you wanted to learn something in the first place will suffice.

"it's not having what you want
it's wanting what you've got"

~soak up the sun by sheryl crow

weddings

2005-06-19T15:25:00.000+08:00

in the past month, i've attended two weddings of people whom i'm not close to. the detachment felt is weird esp since weddings are meant to be a once in a lifetime thing. nevertheless, i was touched by both ceremonies. at mr ng's wedding yesterday, it felt like morning assembly all over again. with the readings, hymns and all. it was short and sweet though. anw, the bride is very pretty. and sh kept trying to take pics of her cos she was assigned to take photo evidences to show yz.

never commit evil deeds. or else bad karma will follow and that you will be plauge by fear and paranoia. just ask my ASM.

i'm supposed to be starting sch in two months time and suddenly when everything has been confirmed, i dont wanna go back to sch. -whine- i'm spending my time experincing quite a number of intriguing activities. just for fun.

which explains why i have yet to replace my lost NRIC. or finish reading all the books i aim to read. or start figuring out the marticulation procedures. priorities priorities.

six degrees of separation

2005-06-19T15:14:00.000+08:00

is the theory that anyone on the planet can be connected to any other person on the planet through a chain of acquaintances that has no more than five intermediaries. The theory was first proposed in 1929 by the Hungarian writer Frigyes Karinthy in a short story called "Chains".

History
In the 1950's, Ithiel de Sola Pool (MIT) and Manfred Kochen (IBM) set out to prove the theory mathematically. Although they were able to phrase the question (given a set N of people, what is the probability that each member of N is connected to another member via k1, k2, k3...kn links?), after twenty years they were still unable to solve the problem to their own satisfaction.

In 1967, American sociologist Stanley Milgram (see Small world phenomenon) devised a new way to test the theory, which he called "the small-world problem". He randomly selected people in the American Midwest to send packages to a stranger located in Massachusetts, several thousand miles away. The senders knew the recipient's name, occupation, and general location. They were instructed to send the package to a person they knew on a first-name basis who they thought was most likely, out of all their friends, to know the target personally. That person would do the same, and so on, until the package was personally delivered to its target recipient.

Although the participants expected the chain to include at least a hundred intermediaries, it only took (on average) between five and seven intermediaries to get each package delivered. Milgram's findings were published in Psychology Today and inspired the phrase six degrees of separation. Playwright John Guare popularized the phrase when he chose it as the title for his 1990 play. Although Milgram's findings were discounted after it was discovered that he based his conclusion on a very small number of packages, six degrees of separation became an accepted notion in pop culture after Brett C. Tjaden published a computer game on the University of Virginia's Web site based on the small-world problem. Tjaden used the Internet Movie Database (IMDB) to document connections between different actors. Time Magazine called his site, The Oracle of Bacon at Virginia, one of the "Ten Best Web Sites of 1996".

In 2001, Duncan Watts, a professor at Columbia University, continued his own earlier research into the phenomenon and recreated Milgram's experiment on the Internet. Watts used an e-mail message as the "package" that needed to be delivered, and surprisingly, after reviewing the data collected by 48,000 senders and 19 targets (in 157 countries), Watts found that the average number of intermediaries was indeed, six. Watts' research, and the advent of the computer age, has opened up new areas of inquiry related to six degrees of separation in diverse areas of network theory such as power grid analysis, disease transmission, graph theory, corporate communication, and computer circuitry.

extracted from Wilipedia.

wanting to but not being able

2005-06-12T09:25:00.000+08:00

i've to face it. my body and mind go on overdrive when i dont have enough rest. which means that my body screws up and i think too much. in fact, when i put those thoughts into words, i'll go "huh?" two days down the road re-reading them again.

why is it that i have so many things left undone? i just have this incredible urge to vegetate but it is an impossibility. because (a). after vegetating, i'll probably regret doing nothing when i could have done something; (b). i actually have a schedule planned for the "things to be done/people to meet". failure to adhere to the schedule will result in pangsei-ing people or not meeting deadlines. talking about deadlines, when i've finally decided to understand the marticulation procudures of smu, the site refuses to let me access it. how great.

spontaneity now is sms-ing people and telling them," hi so-and-so, i'm free for lunch/dinner on (insert day) next week. wanna meet?" on the day itself, i may end up feeling vegetative and not want to go. i do enjoy meeting up with people and they are all the more precious since most of these meetings are during snitches of time. BUT i still miss being able to be spontaneous.

guess what? my mum promised to sponser my university wordrobe (although she has yet to say how much. which means i should innocently try to find out the exact figure to prevent any nasty surprises later) and GSS is on but i have no time to shop. at least for the next week. how ironic. and shopping without my atm card (which i lost together with my wallet) is going to suck.

there's still so many things that has to be done. of course there is. blogging about the lack of time to do the things i need and want to do is not going to make things done. what makes me think otherwise? so why do i wish that i can sit around and do nothing at all?

late night/early morning suppering

2005-06-07T22:23:00.000+08:00

i'm damn lucky not to get into trouble with my parents. considering that i reached home at 3 plus am when i promised i wont be home late. then again, i can be a smart ass and say that 3 plus is early in the morning. so far, they havent mentioned anything yet and i presume i'm qt safe. meaning i will do it again. hahas...

not like i get much opportunity to meet deb at normal hours though. cos our shifts always end up qt diff. i didnt know what struck me to arrange to meet her for supper at midnight when she ends work when i was supposed to end at eight. it felt logical to meet her for supper at that time. in the end, i did end later cos one part-timer was not feeling well so i covered for her and worked till ten. technically i wasted less time in between.

btw, both our managers are such similar people that it's kinda scary. it sounds totally out of pt here but i'm sure deb knows what i mean. in fact, the only reason why the two of us were in orchard searching for a currently non-existent deli was because of them.

oh wells... supper was fun. despite the fact that we're both pretty stoned/tired from work. deb, i'm glad that you can not be vague abt work related stuff with me. i think you'll explode after keeping so much things to yourself. fortunately (or unfortunately), i dont have the same prob. cos i believe in confronting pp regarding the issues. perhaps a bit too much. i do realise that people can have very low tolerance level towards the truth. even if knowing the truth is for their own good. i wonder what will happen if people are more open to honest feedback? but i guess not everyone is matured enough to take constructive criticism.

anw, i'm actually enjoying myself at work although the job itself can get REALLY repetitive. it's always the people who make up the place and livens the experience. i will definitely miss my colleagues when i quit to go back to sch. shucks! when do i get attached to people so easily?

Better Now

2005-05-31T21:54:00.000+08:00

[Collective Soul]

Oh I'm newly calibrated
All shiny and clean
I'm your recent adaptation
Time to redefine me

Let the word out I've got to get out
Oh I'm feeling better now
Break the news out I've got to get out
Oh I'm feeling better now

Oh I'm happy as Christmas
All wrapped to be seen
I'm your recent acquisition
Time to celebrate me

Let the word out I've got to get out
Oh I'm feeling better now
Break the news out I've got to get out
Oh I'm feeling better now

The world's done shaking
The world's done shaking
The world's done shaking me down

The world's done shaking
The world's done shaking
The world's done shaking me down

accident proness

2005-05-29T14:11:00.000+08:00

i often wonder if there's some sorta quota of accidents i have to sustain per month. due to the (probable) fact that i am far from the above mentioned quota, i've been encountering enough accidents/near accidents to hit it in the past three days.

well, i managed to spill one tea plunger of hot water over my hand while doing bar. i had no idea what possessed me to make me think that i can save the tea plunger as well as my hand. it was clearly one or the other. i also succeeded in spilling one container of grinded coffee beans all over the espresso machine. it was such an idiotic action that i didnt know if i should have laughed or cried after it happened. in between all the 'major' accidents, i choose not to remember how many glasswares i broke/cracked.

and i hate it when all my accidents inconvenience the people around me. which is more often than not the case. the apologetic/feel-bad emotion tends to linger way after the accident. meaning i have to get past this accident prone period so i can stop injuring myself and feel bad abt making others do more work. ha! as if it will happen soon.

btw, any form of public transportation that requires me to take 45min to reach a destination a mere 5km away doesnt deserve fare hikes. in fact, the decision makers of the companies should go on hikes more often. since they obviously adore hikes. and that perhaps by hiking instead of taking whatever pte transport they own, they will start to learn what the average commuter go through daily and re-establish the basis of their so far fallacious arguments for their decision.

OLC

2005-05-23T13:14:00.000+08:00

outdoor leadership camp 2005 (otherwise known as LTC) is the slackest camp i think i'd ever attend. there was so little things for us to do that we wondered several times what we were doing there in the first place. the fact that the four of us girls (sab, win, char n me) were so well-trained by lam that we only packed camp essentials didnt help at all. i guess there was only so much each of us could take spending time with each other 24/7 doing nothing at all.

it was kinda like chalet without music (expect for char's hp which we couldnt blast in case we disturb our juniors), sufficient food, tv and cards (which we finally got when cong arrived). the company was great and sleeping in the 'chicken coops' in jln bahtera brought back a lot of memories but there was really nothing for us to make ourseleves useful with.

hanging around with the odacers makes me glad how little things have changed. despite the fact that most of the guys are in ns and that carol is having an enviable life as a camp instructor, things pretty much remained the same. we're still as rowdy and self-amusing as ever; entertained by the same joke from the beginning till the end of camp.

managed to kayak on sun. it wasnt as xiong as i expected it to be. neither did it gave me the sufficient amt of tan i hoped to achieve but hey, it's still kayaking. and although there was no capsize drill, i managed to get relatively wet thanks to three guys who decided to surround and attack me at the same time. sad to say, i never got to take my revenge. hahas...

win mentioned that it would probably be the last time we camp together again. well, we said that when we were in pahang and we still 'camped' together two more times after that. so i would be more optimistic abt camping together as a batch.

looking at my juniors, i do feel some regret that certain traditions failed to be passed down. like waiting for everyone before eating. like the 'yo dee sa si' cheer which was the crudest cheer i'd ever learnt but still a very fun and impressive cheer to say. but i guess every batch is unique. afterall, we did overcome our initial ra-ra-ness and met what was expected of us (and still maintain some sort of ra-ra-ness). hopefully, this new batch will emerge out of their shells and live up to being nulli secundus.

bitch fest

2005-05-23T12:46:00.000+08:00

sometimes i just ask for things to happen to me. it was entirely my fault that i felt like a walking zombie on the second half of the prev week. working on my social life after working 7-3 is giving me a severe lack of sleep. so after sleeping half (or less) than my required amt (which is a lot) for five days, i zzz the past 12 hours away.

at this point, everyone seems more than ever to be going their separate paths.

ok... this is a very bad thing to say but i actually enjoy gossiping. to paraphase kelly: it's not gossip when you're telling the truth. however, i would think that talking behind other's backs, whether truth or not is gossip. basically, i had a major bitch fest with sh, deb and to some extent, my colleagues at work over the last week.

the three-hour meeting with sh could have been more productive. which goes to show that you shld always plan in advance what to do. nevertheless, it was fun meeting up. if we start recording the number of people we talk abt, debbie, i think the number will be astronomical. haha.. this is what you'll get for being schmates for six years and colleagues for almost half a year. we were talking non-stop from the moment we met and i believed we would have continued if it wasnt for the fact that i had to be at work at 7am the next day.

i think i talk too much at work. i was relatively quieter in my last hour of shift on fri and all my colleagues came to the conclusion that there was something wrong with me. i should go reflect on whether i ought to continue to be as talkative. i appreciate the concern but it's weird trying to explain there's nothing wrong with me when i'm being quiet. it's as if i wasnt capable of being silent. hahas...

irony of it all

2005-05-13T22:00:00.001+08:00

gosh! it seems like forever since i've last updated.

it's kinda funny how i get much less sleep when i work mornings despite the fact that i end at three. and yes, i have to reach work at seven. it's worse than going to school cos i have to wake up so much earlier. i still enjoy working morning shifts though as time pass quickly and i can have a semi-life.

went for oec during the labour day long weekend. it made me realise how much i miss odac activities. while crossing the sea to ubin, i suddenly had the incredible urge to go kayaking. one thing though: try not to go over to ubin on your own. waiting for the required 12 pp to take the ferry takes forever. to put it mildly, it was an eventful oec. it was incredible the number of injuries we managed to sustain over the two day period. the weather was freaking hot though. in fact, us j3s could hardly sleep even though we could. so much so that me carol win and ms tay decided to try to bathe at 3 am in the morning in not-so-complete darkness. totally un-glam the things we did but the result was worth it. hahas..

slept for more than 12hrs after that. i think i'm growing more and more to be a pig. anw, the amt of sleep seemed to have short-circuited my brain. cos i went on the shopping spree after i woke up and spent all of my march OT pay. in two hours. i shld cut down on shopping alone in order to save money.

basically, spent the rest of the days working my ass off. ok, exaggeration. not that i mind working. honestly, being in my current line of work has changed my perceptions on a lot of things. like how education does nothing to some people. an example:

customer- (after staring at the menu forever, ignoring my presense despite the fact that she waved me over in the first place) "soft drinks are soft drinks. how can soft drinks be called sodas?"
*note: coke, sprite and coke light are classified under soda in the menu

me - (trying to resist the incredible urge to strangle her)

seriously, talking to such people makes it feel as though my IQ has dropped 20 pts instantly. and such people i speak off are well-educated and rich. i guess possessing platinium or what-have-yous cards and yadda-yadda high ranking posts made them lose their basic courtesy and respect for others somewhere along the way. i feel sorry for them.

there's this hidden story teller/script-writer in all of us. i can write a book based on the stories me and my colleagues cooked up about each other. everyday is so drama-ish. the thing is that my job is not without problems and frustrations (in case anyone thinks that i'm living in lala land) just that i've decided not to let bad things bother me so much and focus on the positivities. i dread becoming one of those cynics i meet daily.

oh... and thanks for ur concerns guys. i got into the course i chose. though i've yet to decide on which uni. leaving things till last min as usual.

random yet true trivial: do you know that you are likely to break your ribs when someone performs CPR on you?

no news

2005-04-24T22:02:00.000+08:00

i've yet to hear from any universities yet. so am i supposed to feel worried? i mean i've heard of classmates signing up for the same course and being accepted alr. a moment ago, i did wonder what will happen if none of the universities accepts me. and my mind drew blank. oh heck... it'll be a few months before semester starts anw.

it has been a long long time since i've slacked at home. and i miss that feeling. hahas...

"It is a great mistake to think you are more than you are and yet underestimate your real value."
Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

plain stupidity

2005-04-22T09:22:00.000+08:00

after working for four months or so, i've come to the sad realisation that some people are plain stupid. the lack of grey matter in their heads make me wonder how the heck they could still eat, talk, breathe and implement stupid policies. sometimes i wonder why certain people are not in sales or advertising because they can crap so eloquently to justify their actions but you know that it's a whole load of rubbish.

i hate it when they film at my outlet. such filming is supposed to create good publicity for the company. bull! every single time filming was done, the crew managed to mess up the whole place and piss off the customers. apparently it doesnt occur to them that we still have a business to run and renting the outlet does not equate to giving them the right to do as they please.

btw, due to many unforseen circumstances, i will be working 58hours this week. in fact, it's 59.5hours after the filming last night.

Under the Employment Act:
38. —(1) Except as hereinafter provided, an employee shall not be required under his contract of service to work —

(a) more than 6 consecutive hours without a period of leisure;

(b) more than 8 hours in one day or more than 44 hours in one week: Provided that —
(iv)where, by agreement under the contract of service between the employee and the employer, the number of hours of work in every alternate week is less than 44, the limit of 44 hours in one week may be exceeded in the other week, but so that no employee shall be required to work for more than 48 hours in one week or for more than 88 hours in any continuous period of 2 weeks.

so technically, i am only required to work 30hours next week (which is so not going to happen) or i can sue my company. i will not put up with such rubbish if not for the fantastic colleagues i work with everyday. to think of it, i should go read the whole employment act to arm myself against future exploitation.

turning into a geographical component

2005-04-19T00:38:00.000+08:00

there are good days and bad days. yesterday happens to be just one of those days in between. so much so that it was just blah. i practically remained stoned the whole day. sometimes i wonder how i am going to survive having a permanent job in future. i'm in my present job for around four months and i'm starting to get restless already. and that's one step away from boredom.

on rare occassions that i actually find the time to meet up with friends, we should do more than aimless wandering. not that it's a bad thing since it'll always be the company that matters most. but wandering around aimlessly somehow doesnt justify the limited 'free' time i have?

some rather frivolous details of my life:
i managed to cause the house to trip twice (is that the way i should phrase it?); thanks to the fabulous electrical appliance called the iron.
i kissed my colleague on the lips. it started out as a joke some weeks ago. due to our utter boredom, my manager decided that he shld witness two girls kiss. and we actually did it. i think she's the only female other than my mum that i kissed voluntarily. even though it was only a peck. hahas...

not struck by stars

2005-04-12T22:47:00.000+08:00

i have never been star-struck before. in fact, i dont think i even went through the teenage phase of going after any idols whatsoever. anyway, this is just one of those random thoughts that occurred to me while i'm working. since i do meet the occasional celebrity.

today's just a rather stoned day. lunch was less screwed than expected despite the new menu. although customers kept demanding for their food. some people just have no patience and courtesy. my crapping skills which are honed after all the years of essay-writing have come to good use again. sometimes i do wonder if they realise that i'm smoking through them.

updating my blog for

2005-04-12T01:35:00.000+08:00

the sake of updating is rather pathetic. but since it has been stagnant for such a long time and shihui actually called me to mention about it (ok... this is stretching the truth a little but hey! it sounds better right? hahas), i shall just update for the sake of updating. even if it means being pathetic.

i kinda envy those who sound intellectual on their blogs. if i attempt to do so, it will just appear to be that i try too hard.

sometimes i wonder why people refuse to use their brains and cause trouble for others around them. if their lack of usage of grey and white matter does not affect anyone, fine and good. but it is usually not the case. working made me realise that bureaucracy is almost impossible to side-step. no matter how ridiculous. which makes me wonder what's the point of employing real people to do work when they need are robots.

been notified that i failed my final theory. how lame and now i have to retake.

can bitching be a good thing? afterall, it's fairer to say everything straight in the person's face. and more constructive. however, it's so much more fun to bitch.

my fingers and hands are now like crap. because it's part and parcel of my job to wash. i guess this is what they term as job hazard.

the new menu launch is going to bring so much 'fun, joy and laughter' to all of us. i hope for minimal temper flaring and complaints.

oh... and i need to go for an smu interview on the 19th. heard that it'll be a group interview. erm.. so how are they going to go about conducting an interview determining our eligibilty to enter the university as a group? strange. it'll be sad if the interview is merely a formality. we shall see.

19 years of age

2005-04-03T01:40:00.000+08:00

in a year's time i will hit 20. and that's old. i dont mind remaining 18 forever. hahas...

anw, a million thanks to everyone who made my birthday a memorable one. the presents (sabo and non-sabo) are very much appreciated. your friends really outdid themselves when you receive a handmade 'beanstalk'. anw, everything is still occupying a large space on my table. was touched by all the surprise visits as well :D talking abt which, how i wish it's my birthday everyday. then i'll be given concessions to slack at work :p

after all the excitment from my bday, back to mundane day-to-day life. maybe not exactly mundane but nothing too interesting. i'm finally 80% done with all the uni applications. i had a hair cut (again).

much that i dont want to sound like a whiner, i really need more time to do stuff like some serious packing and meeting up with people. time management! but am generally quite satisfied with where i am now. just one thing, i wonder how am i going to work on mon if i develop a sorethroat which seems to be the case. and to tell the truth, i asked for it.

my hands are rotting

2005-03-25T01:23:00.000+08:00

i washed two hundred plus glasses at work yesterday.

and i am doing laundry now.

someone once

2005-03-20T00:02:00.000+08:00

asked me a very good ques: why do we have to write down subjects for emails? i guess this applies for blog entries and their titles as well. leaving it blank is kinda funny and having ... is rather boring. shall attempt to start blogging straight away to see how it goes.

met up with the odac girls on thurs and fri. i have to admit that they were two very rare days. since i actually managed to meet almost everyone on those two days despite my inconsistent work schedule. my realisations: the conv i have wih my friends nowadays often veer towards the uncertainty of future; charmaine has officially gone mad (and she almost caused all of us to join her at urban's hse); carol has this tendency to make loud exclamations suddenly and making the rest of us dissolve in giggles and very paiseh but i still love her all the same :)

went out with my aunts after work on sat. was 1.5 hrs late cos of OT. which reminds me that i'd better learn to kep track of time. like all prev outings with my aunts, i freeload. a lot this time. slightly guilty but still quite shuang. i'm just full of contradiction. feel out of touch with technology nowadays. looking at the things i plan on depending on my bro to help me do (in order to slack and be lazy), i think he will kill me.

as for today, i have tons of things to do. the most impt of which is the uni application. which will take up a lot of time considering i didnt browse through any of the sites nor read the leaflets they sent me. and then there's the organised chaos i need to remove from my table. catching up on newspaper reading. though am contemplating to give up on that since i have like one month's worth to catch up on. catching up on tv prog watching. i think i need to come up with a time table for the activities at this rate i'm going.

am high these few days. must be the lack of sleep. but more imptly, it's the things i managed to do despite work. which can be quite a chore organising outings around evryone's schedules but totally worth it. anw, working made me and peishan discover what sheltered lives we lead. and i've decided that no matter what, i hope that i will be able to maintain a positive atitude towards life.

aimless and plan-less

2005-03-08T00:36:00.000+08:00

there seems to be only one ques on everyone's mind these days: so what are your plans? boy, i wish i get one dollar everytime the ques is posted. i'll be much richer by now.

the ans to the ques is that i do not know. all my life i've wandered around aimlessly. in fact, such aimlessness has served me well so far. plus the fact that i dont need a target to do well. i plan on doing my best for the sole purpose of doing my best. i'm tempted to do the same this time round. however, the opportunity costs and risks seem quite high. how?

i'm more or less settled down alr (with reference to prev entry). it does help that my current colleagues knew the people i used to work with or i've worked with them before. and i've got a super cool store manager. actually, despite the fact that i have practically no life thanks to my work and that the pay is not that great, i didnt regret taking on the job. not only that i have proven most of my relatives wrong, i get to meet people that i'll never get to meet otherwise.

despite the govt's efforts in making the society more intergrated (or whatever), it is no doubt that we tend to draw ourselves to people who are similar to us; whether in terms of family backgrounds or education levels etc. currently, i'm "force" to interact with those different (in every sense of the word) from me. and in the process, i learn to be more accepting towards others and the alternate lifestyles of theirs never cease to amaze me. and it's things like that which bring little sparks to my otherwise regimental and monotonous life.

and the bomshell dropped

2005-03-02T02:20:00.000+08:00

i'm still upset but i guess i'll have to learn to live with it.

constancy in change

2005-03-01T02:11:00.000+08:00

hoping that it wont happen. though unlikely. i dislike re-adapting. but i've decided not to be upset anymore.

appreciate those who take pains to meet me for meals during weird and limited timings. wouldnt mind more of such meetings if not for the fact that i'll always end up being almost late for work. hahas...

cant believe i'm saying this. but i miss sch. not the studying part of course. just the talk crap or gossip or stone or odac part.

HOPES and dreams

2005-02-18T23:09:00.000+08:00

i'm tempted to bitch about all the interesting customers (namely the super nice and super nasty ones) i met in the course of my work. but decided to leave one post entirely to that in the near future. i need more practise as a barista. however, making me do bar on sat night with full house crowd is NOT a good idea to train me. i hope i survive.

my driving sucks. i'll be the target of my dad's condescending and sexist remarks of female drivers if he witness my driving. then again, nothing is impossible with determination. i hope.

my parents should get over the fact that i didnt choose to work the night shift just to avoid them. sometimes, i wonder how they live till this day with that amount of paranoia in their lives. fat hope wishing they will get off my back.

the march bday comm is falling apart. hahaz... cos i want to drop out of the comm. shopping for suitable bday presents is difficult enough. shopping for suitable and surprising bday presents with a slight hint of sabotage is a near impossible task. that plus the fact that i'm meeting dear debbie in between shifts. i hope we dont have to shop last min again. i dont think we can afford to do that this time.

randomly useless thought: singapore river is nice. even though it is completely artificial and i havent seen enough rivers in my life to give an accurate opinion.

stagnating blog

2005-02-12T02:35:00.000+08:00

this blog has officially stagnated. along with my brain.

time passes quite fast siaz. soon it will be the fun/terror filled march. i think i choose to believe in the goodness of people. so it will be fun. however, it's terribly unfair cos i need to plan for three people. and the day that me and deb tried to be efficient abt it had resulted in us having terrible headaches.

and i will rem to consider very very carefully before agreeing to report to work early to help out. despite the OT pay. was working practically nonstop yesterday. everyone doing night shift broke something at some point of time. kenna scolded by a customer for nothing. it took all of my willpower not to roll my eyes at him and to correct his grammatically questionable english. sometimes i wonder if working in service industry has made me a less sincere person. i lost count of how many times i apologise without knowing why/feeling apologetic.

this cny has been a relatively quiet one with my grandparents in australia. spend a large portion of it watching canto drama serial with parents that has the everyone plotting against everyone else. incredibly exciting show. hahaz..

outlet bbq was quite nice. though not everyone turned up and it was at some ulu-fied part of pasir ris. got to interact more with the colleagues i seldom talk to.

i would have blogged more if not for the fact that am trying to prevent my blood from being sucked dry by the i-cant-see-them-but-they-manage-to-find-me mosquitoes.

march birthday comm

2005-01-31T23:33:00.000+08:00

ok... so march is still rather far away. but considering that we took something like 5 whole months to settle the whole thing last year, deb and i decided to start early. though there's a general consensus that we'll probably only get it done the day before. the pp who are in the comm better start making yourselves useful. hahaz...

customers tend to assume you know how all the food taste like just because you work in that place. not that i didnt get to try some of the food. in fact, i'm under the impression that the kitchen staff is trying to fatten me (hahaz... so hansel and gretel). however, i'd like to think that i'm a convincing liar.

am developing my potential as a scheduler. since i need to 'slot' friends into my weirded working schedule.

application of murphy's law

2005-01-28T23:55:00.000+08:00

murphy's law really applies. everytime i need to do something impt online and not totally irrelevant stuff, my comp refuses to log on/cant log on/whatever (the fact that this can be posted is cos i tried on and off for like an hour.) and btw, i cant see anything on my tagboard. so for anyone who needs their msgs to be read urgently, pls email me. or sms. hah.

anw, i feel as though i am darn busy. cos when i want to meet friends, my sms will go something like this: so-and-so, let's meet for dinner on blah blah blah dates or lunch on blah blah blah dates. that's the problem with having inconsistent schedules. talking about schedules, the only benefit i derive from such inconsistencies is that i get to read more books. since when people are working, am at home. vice versa.

life is about making it a point. like making it a point to go swim on my off day though all i want to do is to stay in bed. like making it a point to meet up with people despite having conflicting schedules. like making a point not to be so accident prone at work (or at least spread out my accident proness over the week instead of all happening on a single day) i almost broke one teapot and dunno how many water glasses; spilled orange juice from the container which resulted in two other pp helping me to clean up (including my manager) and dirtied my top when the cake foil flew up (dont ask h0w it happened. embarrassment) all within one hour. talking about making a point, i need to make it a point to stop eating so many cakes. but there's just something about desserts that i cant resist. which is bad when i see cakes everyday and kinda get to eat when i'm doing morning shifts. for the record, i put back on all the weight i lost due to my one week of sickness in the beginning of the month. and cny is coming. great!

doing bar for your whole entire shift is not funny or fun at all. there's always something to do. whether is preparing the new orders, washing all the cups and spoons or topping up the ingredients. at least i didnt mess up any orders today. or more like the mistakes got spotted by more experienced colleagues (i.e. everyone else) before they got delivered to the customers. so i have yet to kenna scolding. but with my tendency to get flustered and messy, i can foresee that it will happen in due course. hahaz...

day of the big bad customers

2005-01-24T01:28:00.000+08:00

for some reasons, we get very unreasonable customers today. demanding to change seats when the place is already full. making us run around with requests when they could have just voiced out all their requests at once. scolding us when we were not the one who took the order in the first place. oh crap! i totally felt like throwing plates at one woman who cant even keep her kid quiet yet made so many demands which resulted in us running around. excuse me queen of the universe, i hope you fell flat on your face on her your home.

and did i mentioned that i hate kids? i shall reiterate if i did: i HATE kids. if they are controllable by their parents/guidians, they are alright. but if their inconsiderate parents allow them to run around the place, they are not only nuisances; they pose as dangers for all the service crews and other customers. the worst thing is that if i or my colleagues knock into them (or more like they knock into us), we will be the ones who will get it. people with kids like those should lock their kids up. actually, they themselves should be the ones to be locked up cos they are supposedly "thinking" adults. yarh right.

i guess today is just a bad day. out of every 20 customers, there is usually only one rude/inconsiderate/should-just-go-die one. i've met people who help us shift things when they see us struggling. there are also those who chat with you when you serve them water etc. and surprisingly, there's quite a number of people who actually leave tips despite having already paid for the 10% service charge.

btw, if there is feedback avenues available, i should suggest for the company to change all the seats to sofa seats or throw all the sofas away so that customers wont keep requesting change of seats and giving all of us headaches. and should have a voice recording system so that they cant insist that they said something when they didnt in the first place, putting the blame on us instead. plus i wont get 冤枉 for doing something wrong when i've been instructed by one colleague but another says that it's against SOP. ha! wistful thinking but one must always have hope in life.

without life

2005-01-21T02:01:00.000+08:00

i have no life. which is technically impossible when i am sitting here typing this. but figure of speech-ly, i dont have a life since i need to work 6 days a week including weekends. this means that i have not been attending most family gatherings, friends' gatherings and whatsoever. despite feeling overworked and definitely underpaid, i really shldnt be complaining. it has been a good experience so far.

anyway, since this post is so random anw, i shall continue blabbering. thanks to all the odacers who came to visit me in the at-city-hall-but-out-of-the-way-outlet-i'm-at (esp ivan who visited three times though i only saw him twice). it's great to see familar faces and a nice respite from all the same faces from work all day long (customers dont count). my colleague asked me yesterday if i had considered being an air stewardess. he obviously dont know me or my track record of clumsiness very well. people around me seems rather concerned about the direction towards which my career is heading recently. dinner at soup spoon is lovely. now convinced that soup can be actually filling. and it is official. singapore is so lacking in land that ns-men train in "patch(es) of trees". statistically, this is an anecdotal example but who cares? -end of blabbering-

back to my pt of not having any life. i am reduced to sms-ing people in the death of the night/morning cos i only rem what i intend to say at such timings. yay!

threats dont scare me

2005-01-17T20:03:00.000+08:00

was warned that i will be locked out of the house if i reach home at 3.30am again. i wonder how they intend to enforce that when there is n0 way that my house can be locked from inside. now i know they expect me to call home at 11 plus pm at night when they are already sleeping to tell them i'll be home later. it makes so much sense.

it will be interesting actually: to be locked out. dont get mad; get even.

pubbing

2005-01-17T04:33:00.000+08:00

just returned from my first ever pubbing experience. why did i go in the first place? i have no idea actually. considering i went with people whom i know for less than a week. but i guess it's not exactly dangerous to go with three of your superiors and two other colleagues.

after spending three plus hours there and passively smoking dunno how many sticks of cigarettes, i still dont get the fascination over alcoholic drinks and smoking. surprising, i didnt get drunk although this is the first time i drank bourbon coke and 'so much' alcohol in my life (in inverted commas cos i dont think it's much for those pp who drink on a regular basis). the secret (according to my parents) is to drink very very slowly.

i think i'll have a hard time trying to get rid of the cigarette smell from my clothes, bag and hair. while it was an eye opening 3 plus hours and i felt less out of place than expected, future pubbing will remain in a for-work basis only. personal choice plus it's not cheap to drink. not that i had to pay for anything today though.

wobbles

2005-01-11T23:59:00.000+08:00

i think i should master the art of carrying a tray so as to not scare my customers too much. notice the looks of fear and horror on their faces everytime i walk pass them with my tray wobbling. but i dont mean to do it!

due to work, am going to pang seh two groups of pp on fri. assuming i dont have work and have some super human time management skills, i will ps none. assuming i dont have work and have no such skills, i will ps one group. oh wells...

on night shifts this week. and those are the times when there are more people. will be quite an interesting week. hahaz... all my collegues are super nice. though everyone thought i was waiting for O lvls. darns! i shld just play along. then i can get away with more mistakes ;p

charity fatigue

2005-01-09T23:21:00.000+08:00

two words that have recently surfaced in the papers. doing good is said to beget more good and it is supposed to just grow and grow. ideally. however, this is not true. being bombarded by charity shows on tv months after months, seeing people holding donation cans/bags on the streets on weekends (in fact, some have surfaced on weekdays), people with charity tickets trying to make you buy. all in the name of doing good. just how much doing good can a person take?

it's sad that charitable organisations are fighting for a share from doners. there is no difference as the situation in other cut-throat sectors. does it have to be this way? i naively used to think that they should just assign weights to all these organisations and money is pooled together to be distributed accordingly. who will determine which organisation deserves more weightage then? it is like trying to decide who deserves to live more than the other person.

ironically, it has been statistically proven that there is enough in this world to feed, clothe and house every single person comfortably. but are we willing to give up what we have to give another? such a sad world we live in.

frivolousness

2005-01-09T23:02:00.001+08:00

never ever let un-ironed clothes accumulate. it will grow to such an extent that ironing it seem like a never ending task that took an arduous two and half hours.

you know you are in serious trouble when time tabling is required to facilitate the watching of all the want-to-watch shows on tv.

funny when an rj j1 calls a sa j3 to ask about cca when they dont know each other at all and whatever the j3 says may be completely irrelevant to the j1.

men may not be from mars afterall. or the influx of martians cause men to move to venus temporarily. attached guy friends seem to gush more abt their significant others than attached girl friends. not that there's anything wrong. or maybe it's just me.

new year '2005' resolutions

2005-01-05T23:55:00.000+08:00

know what? screw 2005 new year resolutions with specifics. heck! i dont even think i fulfilled half of my 2004 resolutions. it's really true. why do people make new year resolutions knowing that they wont keep them? and year after year they keep making them. yadda yadda. plus i'm already 5 days (almost 6) late for making new year resolutions. so it'll be kinda weird to go into specifics now. thus, lzay me shall recycle. it's good for the environment anw.

here are my resolutions:
to fulfil all the unfulfilled 2004 resolutions as wall as to refulfil all the reclyclable 2004 resolutions
to be a better person (wanted to say everyday but fig i'll break it the moment i stop blogging)

ta-da! sweet and cover all bases.
to a better, wonderful, peaceful and healthy 2005

6th day and counting

2005-01-05T09:31:00.000+08:00

currently: healthless and jobless

you know the weirded feeling when everyone else is going to school and for the first time in many years, you dont have to go to school? i was devoid of that feeling on the 3rd of jan 2005. too caught up being sorry for myself for being sick. this is the first time i've been sick for so long in so many years, hopefully the last time.

i feel sick not eating. i feel sicker after eating. sometimes, i wonder what message my stomach is trying to tell me. i dont get it. on the bright side, i probably lose all the weight i put on during the holidaying and celebration. considering all i do nowadays is lie in bed and while my day away. since it's the only activity that allows me to feel better. more like not feel anything at all since i'm asleep.

for the very first time, i actually ran out of shows to watch despite having cable. the extent of my slackishness. btw, i'm still jobless. not that i mind in the current state i'm in. so this officially makes me the laziest person in the household as there are now 3 income earners. haha... and being at home all day doesnt make me do the chores. by the looks of it, i will have to go find another job. the person who offered me a posiiton is on leave and her helpful collegue who is supposed to help me check has not gotten back to me yet. but i'm not optimistic. quite funny how i fired myself at my first ever job (or whatever you call it).

meanwhile, i will continue whiling more days away.

(kinda) ode to the year behind

2005-01-01T21:21:00.000+08:00

since both my mind and tummy are still swirling, i will plagiarise this for now:

临别依依，千言万语尽在不言中，只因我们曾经同在一起过。

there's just so many events and people that make up my 2004 that it's hard to pinpoint them specifically. sometimes, i wonder if i shld just videocam my life. then it takes away the trouble and also the joy of blogging/diarying them down. hahaz... lazy me.

too much of good things

2005-01-01T21:04:00.000+08:00

before i start on the prev two exciting weeks of exsitence, i can safely say that i enjoyed too many good things. so much so that i fall sick 4h upon landing in s'pore. and ushered in the new year lying in bed in hope that i dont feel anymore pain or puke any further. however, to all kind hearted folks who wish me to feel better, am alr on the road to recovery now :)

btw, i totally dont feel like working. but i dont think my parents will be able to stand me staying around the house (or not), eating and living for free. plus those working will be working and those in the army will be in the army. which leave my remaining social circle to be extremely small.

btw, in the following week, i need to:

get well!!!
finish clearing up the mess i have created from both trips
call the company to emphasize my availabilty (assuming that i know which number to call) or get a new job
get the PDL settled
attend 2 BBQs
start diary-ing the odac trip down

looks like i dont have to worry abt slacking alr. ;p

happy new year people! be safe and well!

boxing day

2004-12-26T11:00:00.000+08:00

am not exactly in the correct frame of mind to blog abt my 买东西、吃东西 experience in hong kong now. shall leave it to later. been unpacking, washing and repacking clothes since last night. still semi done.

feel guilty for not being able to extend xmas greetings personally to everyone.
so to everyone, a rather late MERRY CHRISTMAS and a happy BOXING DAY!

toa payoh swimming complex

2004-12-17T02:01:00.000+08:00

was packing my stuff in the toilet when this person changed into her swimwear in front of me. and it was not like there were many stalls occupied. so i saw her breasts and all and for some bizarre reason, my eyes lingered on her upper body for one second too much. tp swimming complex always make me witness things that i dont want to. argh!

what makes people insecure?

sometimes, we say things that make people feel uncomfortable, most of the time not realising it. and the person who feels uncomfortable, more often than not, will not mention anything about it. as a result, misunderstandings result. dumb but happens all the time.

first two rows

2004-12-15T11:56:00.000+08:00

9.30: woke up
10.30: finished watching CSI and rushed around to get stuff to leave the house
11.30: met jac and yeiling at thomson plaza after walking back and forth the bus stops
12.05: succeed in getting lost in the middle of some place in yck
12.20: realised we were not that lost after all
13.50: still crapping after laksa lunch at mrs khong's and realising that i'll be very late
14.25: panicking and trying to get cab
14.40: talking to the super friendly cab driver while he prac flew from yck to sajc
14.55: reached sajc, very late and making yz wait
15.30: managed to "smuggle" 6 testimonials out
16.10: alighted from the wrong stop and took cab again
16.30: rushed into driving centre and ended up waiting
19.17: finished BTT and realising i can only get 2 more ques wrong or i'll fail
20.06: finally made our way to mos burger ps meeting kat, sh, inez, karen, py and eunice to celebrate karen's and some other pretty belated bdays
20.58: finally cutting the cake and for once, we cleaned off everything
21.50:leaving ps after strolling around with yz and kat

incessant and mad rush. $14.20 in all for cab fare. but total fun!

one of those days...

2004-12-15T00:33:00.000+08:00

yesterday was one of those days where everything seems to fall apart in front of me. actually, i made it sound more serious than it actually was. but it still sucked to have all your carefully crafted plans ripped apart in front of you. oh wells... guess that's for slacking too much. anw, if this keeps up, i'll be able to open an events coordination company come jan. planning around conflicting schedule is not fun at all.

it's funny. the next three days spent without parents around will be incredibly tame as the whole world is busy except me. let's see... i've slept more than enough; i'm sick and tired of packing; my eyes are probably going to drop out if i watch some more tv; i'll not shop cos i need to break a bank to sustain any further indulgence. so what do i have left to do?

sometimes, i want so much to reach out and help. but rendering help is difficult if the person refuses to open up.

All I Want for Christmas is You

2004-12-12T23:57:00.000+08:00

[Olivia Olson]

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true...
All I want for Christmas
Is you...

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you...

I won't ask for much this Christmas
I won't even wish for snow
I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for Saint Nick
I won't even stay awake to
Hear those magic reindeer click
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you...
You

All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's
Laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need
Won't you please bring my baby to me

I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking for
I just want to see my baby
Standing right outside my door
I just want him for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas is
You
and you and you and you and you

All I want for Christmas is you

i cant resist putting this down. she has such an amazing voice and is only 12 this year. this has become my favourite chrismas song because of her.

sleeping pattern

2004-12-11T11:33:00.000+08:00

waking up at 520am to go to the airport has seriously screwed up my sleeping pattern. slept a total of 19 hours in the past 48 hours. with puts me in a perpectual groggy-sleepy eyes-lethargic state. anw, i have time management problems (like that is a surprise). i cant arrive at a place on time. either too early or too late. and both sucks.

cant believe that it's appraoching the third week of dec (two and half actually) i still have tons of want-to-read books that have yet to read. thanks to the idiot box and my lack of determination to get away from it. how apt. the idiot box. an idiot to sit in front of it for 4 hours per night. turning more idiotic when you cant drag yourself away from it. oh wells... who says i'm smart anw?

i need to plan the itenary for my HK trip. funny thing to do considering that the last time i went was when i was 5. and ~~need to pack.~~ figure out how to pack without actually having the luggage.

all that aside, staying home on sat is a good thing. dont like to squeeze with the crowd.

rain clouds

2004-12-10T14:45:00.000+08:00

i think the rain clouds have something against me. when i'm alone at home, it has to rain and stop raining and start raining and so on. and i have to walk all over the house opening and closing windows. it's making me sicker and more upset than alr am.

i HATE losing stuff. no matter how the size and cost. and i wont rest until i find it. crap!

irony

2004-12-09T01:36:00.000+08:00

while i was busy wiping off tears after reading the blog of someone who has recently passed on, got msn-ed on the screwed up layout of my own blog. was quite amused for a few moments. i guess i get more emotional reading than watching say movies. a lot of written stuff have made me cry but very few movies.

anw, realised that the tag board problem was less solved than expected. normal under firefox but weirded under IE. oh wells... i just dont have the patience or affinity with html codes. but due to the help from my helpful friends, i shall try fiddling with it some more.

type of blogger

2004-12-09T00:52:00.000+08:00

You Are a Social Blogger!

Your blog is more of a semi-private affair for your friends.
It's how you keep in touch... sharing stories, jokes, and pics.

What kind of blogger are you?

why do oil splatter onto you?

2004-12-08T01:09:00.000+08:00

(a). because there's water on the hot plate and clumsy you contribute to more water anyway
(b). because the hotplate cum metal bowl thingy is slanted downwards and you happen to be sitting in the direct path of the downward slant. by probability and laws of physics, think one can calculate why one person in the table of five happen to kenna the most. hahaz
(c). because i am just suay

it's funny how people click. even though we do the same things every single first-3-months class gathering like mahjong (but this time is with real tiles), play cards, watch vcds (always pirated. hahaz), disturb shiyun etc, i will still managed to enjoy each and every gathering.

i had a tiny taste of what it's like to be rich (and famous?) on mon. interesting experience. i dont mind more of such flitting eye-opening encounters. since i'm not likely to be rich or famous anw. and i am a living proof that someone with fear of heights can be in odac and graduate from it still fearing heights.

my flying/training off s'pore and back schedule [edited]:
hong kong: 19th (10am) to 25th (7pm)
pahang: 26th (7.30pm) to 31st (7.50am)
so sorry to disappoint you pp, i have not left yet. :P

and thanks ivan for helping to fix my tagboard.